With 30 minutes to spare, I filed my taxes. Feeling like an adult and over the moon, knowing that in a few weeks i'd have actual money to add to my depleted pile; I began to brainstorm. What could I use it for? Besides throwing it all towards an apartment? Being a responsible 'Adult', isn't an option i'd like to sign up for. 

As of right this second, I can either invest in a new Mac Book Air. Mine, takes 15minutes(and counting) to start, and lasts a whopping 2 hours on full charge. OR, I can purchase a one way ticket back to Bali... 

Each a symbol reflecting a path of choice that will lead me on my way... 

A computer, a device to further knowledge and help achieve GREATNESS


A one way ticket to a land of relaxation and spiritual goodness. 

So the question is this:

Do I purchase a device to help my 21st century life, or catch a plane to escape it?

Come on, I blend into the landscape...

Come on, I blend into the landscape...

K Bye

As I watched a plethora of inebriated beings attempt a sober walk, while the sun seared my porcelain layer; I fell in love. The architecture got me. The simplicity of life, bordered by the detailed buildings, is where it's at. New Orleans is my new place.

To give Y'ALL a bit of background information, I began my life in Newtown, CT. From there we were uprooted to New South Wales, Australia. Upon return to the States, I finished the remainder of my High school years in Newport, RI. Now as you know, I'm currently living in New York City... Sense a pattern? Every single part of my life, I've resided in a region beginning with 'NEW'. Therefore, New Orleans must be my next city. It fits in my strange criteria; and I would only be doing more damage if I didn't go. It's the only plausible answer... The Man Upstairs has pointed me in the right direction.

Click through ^

It's a sign. 


"I am my worst enemy"

I've heard that statement before, but never fully unsheathed the viscious gremlin it refers too. As you know sleep hasn't been a joyous occasion as of late, my brain thinks it's morning after sunset. So here I am, laying in my wonderful bedroom... Being the living room, and my bed; the couch. Oh how luxurious you say? Darling please, wait until you see my bank account ;)

- off topic - 

This awkward lull has lured my mind into the deep crevices of my brain that I shouldn't have access too. Negativity is what resides in my unchartered grey matter. The angel on my shoulder, is no longer free. She's been beaten and imprisoned by the red man. And guess who's her cell mate! Some dumb white girl who let a mythical creature deceive her. So here I am. Locked in my own head with some damn angel that doesn't even work. All while, the Man running my show, won't let me direct it. 

 Possibly the creepiest picture I've ever seen, unfortunately it fits. 


I'm going to go eat a rainbow. 

Rethink Your College Experience

Taisa and I came to a realization sitting at the gate, awaiting our glorious 5am flight. All the cool cats in bell bottom yoga pants, wearing flip flops, sporting their favorite pink pillow all while their greek letters are consuming them; need to return to their caves. According to our observations, not one knew how to navigate an airport. Either they had a deep misconception of an airport gate, or the only store front their radar recognized was Jamba Juice. I want to let them know, that just because they had a fresh spray tan and flights to the tropics for #springbreak2014. Doesn't mean that the outsiders don't notice the insane streaking that the tanning lotion swore it wouldn't give you, or the shitty quality of your fake ID's. They looked stupid. Especially when they're running around the airport like lost children. They must get their priorities straight. Being in college isn't an excuse to turn your sorority into a brothel. Perhaps Cancun isn't the best idea?Give your deathly livers a break, because I can hear your desks calling you home. 

Because this looks fun...

Because this looks fun...

Sleepless In New York

Dusting off old memories is just about as exciting as eating your first olive; at first you want to spit it out, then you become accustomed to the flavor, and boy does the aftertaste linger. You become enthrawled in the past, and the future 'what ifs'. No more can you focus on errands, but only stagnate. Sleep isn't an option unless you're absolutely exhausted. Sometimes even then you lay still, eyes wide open in a coma state. It's odd, your body's resting but your head is spinning. Constantly sifting through old memory files and organizing the new. Projecting new possible excitements into dreams while your eyes remain open. You tirelessly attempt to force yourself to sleep. Now wishing for the immediate blackout that quickly sends you to the morning. Counting sheep of course doesn't help. It comes to a point when your body dissolves into the mattress and without knowing you drift away. Without acknowledging the kind gift that you've finally received. Only until the morning, when you dust the sleep from your eyes and regret the insufficient slumber, do you realize. You realize that no matter how hard you try, without uncovering your true desires, you won't achieve an adequate sleep. You'll forever sit in the internal prison of your uneasy mind. That's the scariest reality of them all. The lifelong mission to contempt. The mission that most have only just begun. 

City That Never Sleeps - Peter Donnelly

City That Never Sleeps - Peter Donnelly

I swear I'm a target for unusual occurrences, especially for creepy men. Thank the Man upstairs most of the time I'm oblivious to my surroundings. Earlier today, was the icing on the cake. The cherry gently placed on top the camel's overloaded back. It's what I receive for doing my job correctly.

The phone rings, I heighten my voice to sound enthused about my position and the man says as follows: "You seem like a nice girl." Slightly deterred, I accepted the compliment and continued to listen. His voice was husky with a frustrated tone, and a thirst for revenge. No name, proceeded to accuse the establishment for a violent crime committed in late October. Extremely confused I asked if I could transfer him to a manager. Bad idea. Apparently the managers were the ones burying the supposed 'case'. At this point he had started to raise his voice, and began the threats: "It's turning into a conspiracy! People will get shit. They will all get their shit; it's what they deserve! They must all go to PRISON!" Baffled, by his accusations I asked for his information. Apparently he was investigating for the Miami FBI... Well that's where my heart rate slowed. In no way would an FBI agent be so informal and loose with his threats. The 'cop' from hell refused to give me his name, and at that point a constant beep is all that filled the phone. 

The most disturbing phone call I have ever received. My managers promised me they're not ex-cons. I want to believe them, but I'm sleeping with one eye open tonight... 


My star sign claims that I'm an organized loner bitch. Loner bitch I will say is correct, but this weekend I went home and forgot to grab a few necessities for a trip to the southern states. So organized, I am not. In hopes for warm weather and 'culture', Taisa and I are making a great escape. I assume it to be warmer than the iceberg of NYC, and I don't have any spring clothing. Purchase some, you say? Unfortunately life hasn't allowed me to rake in the dough just yet. I had to steal a few hunnids from my piggy bank...I'm 21. So shout out to anyone in Florida or New Orleans, please if you see me don't tell anyone that I wore the same outfit for a week. I promise I'll shower.  


Midnight Snack

My health kick is slowly dissolving into the trans fats I gladly pour on my face. Add that to my nocturnal status and I'm on my merry way to obesity. So last night my Ukrainian lover, Taisa and I got the munchies hard - not the drug induced kind. I don't need drugs to appear clinically insane. Distraught at the sight of vegetables in the fridge, we decided to stealthily order. Two thick shakes, mozzarella sticks, and cheese fries, once Blair went to sleep. We forgot to inform the delivery man that an evil menace was in slumber and to please refrain from buzzing. If Blair was awoken we would surely die and immediately be reported to Sir Ronald, our trainer.

I made the executive decision to set a timer for 15 minutes, by then we would walk down and await his arrival. No buzz needed. Without breathing we rugged up. It took me forever to properly shut the door silently. As if it was a challenge on survivor and immunity was my only option. Might I add the door shut without a sound. Taisa gave me a silent applause, we were so proud of ourselves. Criminals in the night, and we were good at it. Heads held high, we were ready to take on a jewelry store. Seductively bending amongst the lasers, frosting our ninja bodies with diamonds without a fear.

It's amazing how one second you're radiating happiness and the next horror, like you're being chased by an axe murderer. Our veins collapsed as we heard the buzzing from within. Terror at its finest replaced Taisas' eyes. My immediate reaction was to fiddle with the locked door. Of course I didn't have keys, and Taisa was too busy contemplating suicide to give me her set. As the buzzing continued I knew we had been caught. There was no way Blair was still in the arms of Morpheus. If anything he would've greeted us with two tickets to Satan, for disturbing his peace. Ants in my pants, we began to sprint down the stairs. Most likely waking all in our path. I've never descended 3 flights in less than it takes to unlock my cellular device, but last night I did. Adrenaline. It's the only conclusion. How fast we ran was inhumane. The poor little delivery man was puzzled. We seemed as though this was our first meal in years, and snatched the goods. Little did he know he almost got us whipped. Once the insanity dispersed and we were safe. I felt as though I had to vomit. 1 because of the sudden exercise burst and 2, I was convulsing.

Fortunately Blair didn't wake. Something we should've known because school doesn't allow her to sleep. Little Blair remained in her dreamland as Taisa and I slipped into a nightmare. You may think we're pathetic, we are. But it was worth it. Terrifyingly worth it. 


Taisa's face as the buzzing began.